Over my first summer season of hill racing I have developed a finely tuned system that I utilise before the gun (or horn, whistle or person shouting “GO!”). I’m generously willing to share it with you, my fellow Westie. 

Kipchoge has his pacers, special course and custom shoes. Well, you now have this sequenced checklist. The method which will help you to successfully represent possibly the best small-to-medium size hill running club in the West end of Glasgow with honour, pride and a yellow vest. 

Just follow these steps and you too might one day reach such considerable achievements and accolades as Kipchoge and I.

1. Drink water

2. Pack mandatory kit

3. Decide on: 

– Vest 

– Vest on top of t-shirt 

– Vest on top of long sleeve t-shirt

4. Change into racing kit

5. Pin number to vest

6. Warm layer on

7. Tie shoe laces 

8. Toilet visit

9. Check that I did pack all the mandatory kit

10. Panic about missing whistle

11. Search for missing whistle

12. Remember whistle is built into the bag for the mandatory kit so it can’t get lost

13. Take off warm layer

14. Check that the race number is pinned securely

15. Adjust the pins

16. Check that the race number is straight

17. Adjust the pins

18. Move the race number to the centre

19. Adjust the pins

20. Check that the race number is straight

21. Adjust the pins

22. Check that the race number is pinned securely – it is, no pin adjustment necessary

23. Warm layer back on

24. Drink water

25. Change decision of vest on top of t-shirt

26. Take off warm layer

27. Take off vest

28. Remove t-shirt

29. Vest back on

30. Warm layer back on, again

31. Re-tie laces which have become undone 

32. Warm-up jog

33. Re-tie laces tighter

34. Warm-up jog

35. Superfluous toilet visit

36. Warm layer off

37. Re-tie laces, this time looser

38. Walk to start line

39. Go back for race kit bag

40. Line up for the start

41. Adjust the pins

42. GO!

4 replies
    • Arron Sparks
      Arron Sparks says:

      Ah yes, relays. Many of the same techniques apply with some slight additional steps to ensure your Westie team podium position.

      * Locate leg partner
      * Locate vest for partner
      * Toilet visit
      * Partner looses race number
      * Don’t panic when informed you’re race number has been handed in.
      * Partner receives race number again.
      * Go through kit check 45 minutes too early.
      * Adjust pins

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