George Cummings Road Relay,2010

Results

This is a 4 lap Relay Road Race around the streets of Houston. Would our club be able to summon up the services of 4 V50's? Being that this was a road race and a short one(lap of 2.6mls.)could we get any interest at all,bearing in mind this was Two Breweries day, 25th September. Could anyone care? Well Reid,Quinn,&Semple had thrown all caution to the wind and tossed their hats into the ring. Would anyone else turn up for this triumvirate of ELITE V50's? No. So they all went home in a foul mood, complaining of the state of ........the country today and anything else that took their fancy.No actually all three did the final lap. No, again that would'nt work, would it? No, honestly - this time - John Q was the star of the day and raced laps 1 & 4 and supremely fast at that I tell you.

As we met up in the glorious sunshine of Houston's streets we did think of Chris,et al, at The Breweries (sorry et al) did'nt know who was racing, in that classic race.Look forward to hearing about your exploits.

Now we never wish to "lower the tone" in these reports but for your information and accuracy of the day's events we should really mention the typed Notice in the village hall that greeted us. Those of a nervous,or iffy, disposition, should, if they don't want to know the score, look away now. Competitors were warned that after last year there should be no "urinating in residents' gardens"."Well, quite frankly Mavis I've never seen anything like that one and i've........." Yes,yes, yes, can we just...It was not entirely clear fron the said notice if this so-called spraying of the azaleas was a distinct political statement on the villagers talents who perhaps had not reached the upper echelons of the Chelsea Flower Show, or indeed could it have been in the post-race delirium or joy and pain in all the greenery they were transported back to their 1960's avocado green bathroom and had proceeded to............let's move on shall we. The village hall being a mere couple of hundred metres away only enraged the,quite rightly, indignant villagers further when some appeared carrying banners exclaiming ......NO SLASHERS IN HOUSTON . Dear oh dear - you could'nt make it up could you? Gentle reader,and you may be far from gentle now, the NOTICE did not stop there. For pity's sake what now? Competitors were also warned that "excessive spitting was not allowed". Quite right - would'nt have any of us at that game. But some were asking where is the line drawn between a spittal and slavering all over..........do we have to go into all this? Indeed when young Semple was waiting to race he did see, and please this was with peripheral vision only, one,two three, four, racers, emit ejaculatory bodily fluid. This indeed did untold damage to all around as several innocent bystander runners immediately fainted and had to revived by the sterling work of Ambulance services. We hear word that many will have to undergo a lengthy and detailed counselling programme to get them anywhere near fit again. Semple was only spared this deep trauma by his lightning fast reflexes to avert his full gaze in time. However,it must be realised that we all suffered this emotional trauma at the expense of our racing times. Oh really,wondered when you would.......well that's my excuse and I'm........wondering how long will we get away with it? So, Don was coming in well,well, ahead of time, and fighting off the trauma and fighting to the line,"excuse me,excuse me coming thro' i'm going to spit", it was bleep,bleep, bleep to set the watch and off. Far, far too fast these races,but look you're only young once. Or chould that be ......no,no don't even think it.

Don and John had superlative races and John did as well on the fourth leg cheered on by Don & I. My race was painful but finishing fast to keep the hounds at bay.

Great day out , thanks guys for a good laugh as always. Sorry about "the tone", but it did come with a WARNING.

Results to follow, if indeed they are not aleady on our site.

Posted by Hamilton Semple on Sun 26 Sep 2010 | 8 comments

Category road race